Every now and then, I feel a call to share something a little deeper on social media. I write about what’s coming up intuitively for me, usually it’s a message of hope or something encouraging. I never know why I’m writing it or who the intended person is who’s meant to read it, but it feels important. Here’s something I wrote in 2023 that I shared on Facebook and Instagram. It touched a few people and I was asked to share it as a blog, so here it is. I hope these words meet you where you are, and that they provide some comfort and upliftment if that’s what you need today.
You are not destined to feel lonely, sad, anxious, depressed, or lost forever.
You belong here.
You are here for a reason, even if it doesn’t feel like it.
You are worthy, simply because you exist.
Healing, moving forward and getting back to who you truly are (not who the world wants you to be) is absolutely possible.
Three years ago, I was in a very dark place.
Like most of us in 2020.
It’s the year I started questioning things. I saw the world differently, like a thick veil had been lifted. I found out a lot of yukky stuff about things I now believe are designed to keep us from thriving the way we were always meant to.
After my Dad died, my world got darker. I lost my sense of identity. I prayed, read the Bible, called friends, called therapists. But that December, when I had a huge breakdown, I couldn’t get a single therapy session. It’s when I was forced to face a lot of uncomfortable, heavy stuff.
Emotions I’d suppressed growing up in a house where we had to walk on eggshells for the most part. Bless my Dad, but he was a very difficult man to live with. My Mom was constantly on edge and unable to fully relax. Those kinds of things, and not being able to be angry or express your true feelings, impact us later in life more than we know. I did a lot of shadow work, emotional expression, and self healing – mostly through writing letters I’d never send.
In early 2022, I found some light and got inspired to change my lifestyle after seeing a random Instagram post. I started implementing tiny habits and adapting my routine to manage stress better and to live with more inner peace. I discovered ways to raise my consciousness (become more aware), I tried more things that fed my soul, and I become more connected. This is after what many call the dark night of the soul. I learned about energy and how our emotions can reveal themselves physically and mentally to signal to us that it’s time to change something.
I learned how our body communicates with us all the time.
I learned (what I personally believe) that we are energy/conscious beings having a human experience, and this shifted so much inside me. Instead of thinking we only have this one little life to get perfect (what pressure!), or that we’re at the mercy of external events, I now believe we’ve probably had many lives and this is a significant one for us to work through karma, heal old wounds, clear generational traumas, and remember who we are.
I got back into meditating and deep conversations with God (our creator and source of love, not the invisible man in the sky we’re told to obey and fear, who’s going to send us to hell if we do something wrong). I went for long walks by myself in nature. I hugged a lot of trees. I forgave a lot of people. I also forgave myself and started embodying self-compassion and self-awareness. (Imagine if we were taught this kind of thing at school. What a different world we’d have).
But it’s not all sunshine and rainbows.
How can it be with so much duality?
If you look around you, really look, you’ll see that our current society and rigid man-made systems and constructs are not about kindness or hope or love.
2020 showed us that.
It’s quite the opposite actually. Acknowledging this, understanding this, and choosing to gently rebel by living with more inner peace (e.g. emotional healing and nervous system regulation) is how I believe we take back our personal power – and our lives.
If you’re feeling the weight of the world, hollow on the inside, anxious, or questioning why you’re here… know that you’re not alone. You’re always supported and healing is so possible.
But you have to decide to do the inner work.
No one can do that for you unfortunately. We can’t wait for the world to change for the better, because it might not. We CAN change our own internal world, which then ripples out into our immediate outer world.
We are all capable of changing the narrative of our lives.
Sometimes we just need a little reminder that it’s possible.
And it really is.
Sending much love your way, whatever is going on for you.